I posted this rant a month ago on myspace and thought it too entertaining to keep private. Please keep reading if you would like to take a closer look into my love life..... or lack thereof.
In the year I have lived in Oakland, CA, I have found the most difficult thing to do is meet awesome, kind, and genuinely goodhearted people. Living in a bigger city might mean I have a better chance meeting new, exciting, different, and interesting people...... but it also means I have a better chance meeting ass holes, douche bags, flakes, crazy bitches, the insane and, even rapists and murderers.
In the year I have lived in Oakland, CA, I have found the most difficult thing to do is meet awesome, kind, and genuinely goodhearted people. Living in a bigger city might mean I have a better chance meeting new, exciting, different, and interesting people...... but it also means I have a better chance meeting ass holes, douche bags, flakes, crazy bitches, the insane and, even rapists and murderers.
For instance, there was a guy named Jason who came to my place of employment every day I worked to try to convince me I should hang out with him. I made a lot of excuses at first. I dunno why I didn't want to hang out with him until, finally one day, I gave in and decided I would walk to Berkeley with him.
Now it's really not that far of a walk, you understand. He lives right on the border. But I just got off of work and had been standing on my feet since 6am. I suggested we ride our bikes but he started whining about how his bike is a piece of junk and that he hates to use it.
OK sure. I'll walk.
We ended up walking to the Berkeley Bowl where he bought a $40 durian fruit. Yes, he bought a giant fruit and carried it around with him all afternoon in a brown paper bag. I should mention that before we left, we got really high smoking out of his new vaporizer. That thing was seriously thee best piece of equipment I have ever smoked out of in my entire life! We were really fucking high. He was so high, he put down his brown paper bag full of $40 durian fruit somewhere, and walked away. He eventually remembered he wasn't carrying it and had to go look for it..... but someone must have noticed a brown paper bag that said "Berkeley Bowl" without it's owner and thought whatever's in the brown paper bag that said "Berkeley Bowl" would be tasty. So they took it. But they must not have known what a durian fruit was, or that it cost $40 because we eventually found it out on Telegraph, next to the curb.
By this time I was STARVING!!!! I think the only thing I had to eat that day was a pastry and a cup of Ethiopian Harrar. I noticed a guy at some point eating a huge hamburger he'd gotten at a pub a block down and I fell in love. I decided I would have one but Jason insisted on a salad. An epic salad, for sure, and damn good.... but still, I was craving a burger! I NEEDED A BURGER!!!! He said he couldn't possibly eat the salad himself and if I still wanted a burger afterwords, then I should get one...
OK. Whatever.
We ended up sharing his silly salad. But after we ordered, he realized he didn't have cash (in a cash only restaurant) and I had to pay. Pay for the salad I didn't really want.
OK. *rolls eyes* Fine.
But wait, there's more! As we were heading back to Oakland, I saw one of my regulars across the street, so I crossed to say Hello, how are you? It's nice to see you on the other side of the counter and all that other nice crap one acquaintance says to another.... and do you know what fruit boy does? He gets on a bus with some cash he didn't have and left me. In Berkeley. Then I had to go to his house to get my bike.
Yep. This is when I realized why I didn't want to hang out with him in the first place.
There was another time my housemate Corey and I thought it would be a great idea to drink a bottle of champagne, and a few pitchers of piña coladas before heading to The White Horse to meet up with Brooke (our other housemate) who had been at a different bar drinking. The White Horse is a gay bar. A pretty bad one, I hear, but what the hell! It sounded like fun.
As soon as I stepped into the door, I was literally jumped by an extremely tiny butch lesbian. I was trashed, mind you, and for as young as she appeared, she was actually significantly older than me. You could probably never tell by the way she acted. Her name was Ashley.
Immediately she's all over me, her tongue down my throat. I sort of went with it because I am, indeed, a bit curious about women. I ended up going home with her but we didn't sleep together. Lord knows I tried to take her pants off but she wouldn't let me! She had a lot of issues with me being a bisexual... !? Something I still don't really understand about gay people. You would think that having something against bisexuals is a little counterproductive...... anyway, she said we weren't sexually compatible but she did say she thought I was kinda gay. Those were her words. "I think you're kinda gay."
???
Then she said she thinks I am a "top" lesbian. I believe she was referring to the fact that I was the aggressive one in the sack, *wink wink*, and assumed because I'd never slept with another woman, I would be passive aggressive, or something. So all we did was fool around. She said we could go to San Francisco and pick up women together when I mentioned an upcoming show I was going to (possibly by myself, although had been asking everyone I knew if they would like to come with me). She said she'd go so I gave her my number but, when morning rolled around, I had a feeling I wouldn't hear from her. For one, she was wasted and couldn't remember my name or where I was from, even after repeating it several times throughout the night. I highly doubted she'd remember anything about a show in the city. But she remembered.
Two days before the show, I got a text message form her. She asked me if I still wanted her to go. I said sure! Why not? The more the merrier, right? By this time I had asked Jen, Billy, Scott and Brian if they would like to go and all of them I asked well before I asked her. They all seemed interested, at first, but all ended up being occupied with their own lives. Except Brian. Two things you should know about Brian. One, he is homeless. Two, he is harmless. I met him when I started working at Cole in September of last year. Just about every day, you can find him in front of Cole drinking coffee, smoking a cigarette and reading a book across the street. Mostly he's just out there talking to anyone who will hold a conversation with him. When Ashley found out we were going to the show with a homeless man, she got really upset. She said that it wasn't normal for someone to want to hang out with a homeless person. She kept saying I was naive but I asked her to not judge the man before she even met him. So she stuck around.
We met up with him at a pub called Barklays where we grabbed some food and a beer before heading to the city. While I was in the loo, they had small talk and, before we left, she told me he was alright, she was cool with it now and we could go to the city. GREAT! But things didn't end so great.... At the show, while I was listening to the band, Ashley went outside and started making accusations. She asked Brian what his motives were and confessed to him that she hates all men. SERIOUSLY? That's literally half the population! Perhaps more????? Wow! I can maybe understand that something seriously fucked up happened to this girl, sometime in her past. Even so, I generally try to stay away from people who hate certain groups of people. She never really had a problem with Brian being homeless. She had a problem with Brian's penis. I find it a little ironic she admitted to her hatred of all men after buying the both of us our very own United Against H8TE buttons.
We ended up taking a cab back to the east bay where she continuously attacked Brian verbally, telling him he was a piece of shit, that she hated him and telling me he was trying to manipulate me. She also tried to tell me that he was sick in the head and obsessed with me, all the while pawing at me and telling me she was going to come home with me. At this time I was sobbing, trying desperately to keep her from touching me. I seriously felt violated. All I wanted was to be home and away from her. When I finally got out of the cab, I gave her money and told her to never call me again. I think it took her about 20 text messages and 10 voice mails afterwords when she finally realized I wasn't going to pick up.
And last, but not least, there's Vijay Lakireddy. Go ahead and google his name. Fuck it, I'll just post a few links.
Vijay Lakireddy Enters Plea Bargain
Sexual Slavery in Berkeley
A few of the many articles that pop up when you search his name. He's been pursuing me for over half a year now. I went on a few dates with him and I couldn't put my finger on it, but something wasn't right about him. And it wasn't just me, but my housemates felt the same way too. It was Brian who finally filled me in that he's married. His wife and two children live in India. That's when I decided to stop talking to him. But after telling people what I had found out about him and how shitty I thought it was that he withheld that information, I started hearing rumors about his father. Crazy rumors about a sex ring, his father's arrest and Vijay's involvement. It didn't take much investigating to figure out that the rumors were more than true.
I like how it says charges were dropped due to some technicality..... So this is what I have been dealing with when I go out and meet new people. Jesus Christ, what's wrong with me!!? Am I doing something to attract them or is it I have to weed them out to get to the good people? Things like this make me want to hide in my house. I seriously don't want to meet anyone new anymore. I miss how easy it is to meet good people like it is back home.
Seriously, what the actual fuck?
